PMTM Blog: Malt Liquor List O’ Goodness

People who don’t really know me may not realize that I’m a connoisseur of the cheapest of cheap beers. If they sell it at the corner store for less than $2, chances are I’ve tried it and, quite possibly, purchased it numerous times.

When it comes to cheap beers, nothing makes this guy happier than a nice bottle of malt liquor. The little things in life really are the best. Earlier today, I compiled the Official Pass Me the Mike Top 5 Malt Liquor List O’ Goodness. Enjoy.

5) Olde English 800 – For some reason, I always feel like such a FANCY MAN when I drink this stuff. Like a true, distinguished gentleman, the pinky always goes up when I enjoy OE.

4) Hurricane HG – High Gravity = High Class in my book. I don’t walk when I drink Hurricane. I strut.

3) Schlitz – Ahhhhhh, yes. The bull of the woods, if you will. The following video speaks for itself.

2) Colt 45 – While it pains me to do so, I’ve got to disagree with the great Billy Dee Williams. My own experiences tell me that Colt 45 does NOT work every time. I’ve yet to meet any females who enjoy frosty malt beverages as much as yours truly. Nevertheless, I won’t let that cloud my judgment. The Colt is quality brew and as smooth as I am sexy. It may not work every time, but it’s damn sure always a good choice.

The King! Cobra, that is.
The King! Cobra, that is.

1) King Cobra – ALL HAIL THE KING! All malt liquors are not created equal and this one carries the title of king for a reason. It’s truly a lovely beverage (the flavor is second to none) and I encourage fellow malt drank enthusiasts to support King Cobra like I do. I tossed back a couple of bottles the day I met my fiancée, so this stuff holds a special place in my heart. Beer snobs like to bash Anheuser-Busch and the beers they make, but with Hurricane and the King making appearances on my list, they must be doing something right.

What’s your favorite malt liquor? Hit me up: or Twitter: @PMTMike


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